Letters from Abroad: Two Hours from Terror

[Originally published in The Tiger Newspaper, March 23, 2016; written March 22]

This morning I was sitting in a four-hour intensive class; and like the good attentive student I am, I was paying more attention to Twitter than to the lecture. That’s when I saw the first tweet about an explosion at the Brussels airport. I immediately switched over to Google to find an article with more details but found nothing. I realized the first tweets about the incident had been sent within the last half hour, and I realized I was about to watch something terrible unfold.

My first thought went to a friend of mine that I knew had a connecting flight in Brussels today. Naturally, she was the first person I sent a message to. I found out a few hours later that she was about to land in Brussels when the explosion happened, so the plane changed courses and landed somewhere outside of Brussels instead. I kept up on Twitter and various news sites that were giving live updates. I got back to my room after class and started live streaming the news, searching Google, checking my emails. I was waiting for an email from the study abroad office or the US Embassy and waiting for President Obama to make a statement and waiting to hear if there was a threat in Paris or if I needed to stay where I was and avoid the city. I was just sitting there waiting for someone to tell me what to do or how to feel.

Just as a point of reference, Paris is about 2 and half hours away from Brussels by train. A lot was running through my mind. An airport had been attacked, a metro station had been attacked, a city had been attacked. Not just any city – the capital of Europe, the headquarters for the European Union, a city I was just in a month ago. No, I was not in the city for the attack; however, since I have been old enough to understand the gravity of terror attacks the closest one geographically was in San Bernardino. That was almost 2,500 miles away. This is the first time in my life that I have been only two hours from terror. This is the first time in my life that I’ve had to think through which of my friends are here in Europe, and which of them could be near Brussels today. This is the first time in my life that I’m living in a city that has experienced an awful terrorist attack within the last four months –– a city that could very, very easily be targeted again. 

Also today, the Gare du Nord metro station in Paris was evacuated when an abandoned suitcase was discovered. The station was reopened a couple of hours later when authorities determined there was not threat. I was telling someone earlier how it was crazy that despite the November attacks, I wasn’t afraid of coming here. Now though, despite how much I want to go see the Eiffel Tower lit in the colors of the Belgian flag, I’m too afraid to get on the metro.  

As far as Clemson goes, I have at this point received several emails from my program director and the study abroad office checking on my location and safety. As far as Paris goes, the state of emergency has been extended until May 26. Until now, that hasn’t meant much to me, because since I’ve been here you would never have realized Paris was in a state of emergency. Life here continues to move on, just as it does anywhere.

So, I am safe, and I am thankful that I was two hours from the attacks and not in the midst of them. And no, I haven’t once had second thoughts about coming to Paris. My thoughts and prayer are with those who have been affected by the attacks. Paris stood strong in the face of terror, and I know Brussels will too.

 Je suis Bruxelles.

–– Kelsey 

Letters from Abroad: What No One Likes to Talk About

[Originally published in The Tiger Newspaper, March 10, 2016]

No one ever really likes to talk about the hard part of studying abroad. 

Your program will mention culture shock and the different stages, and how it will be more difficult for some than for others. It will reference reverse culture shock, and how hard readjusting to American life will be., But nobody wants to talk about how hard studying abroad is. Nobody wants to hear it, especially when they’re dreaming of life in another country, of freedom like they’ve never had before, and of the chance to book plane tickets to neighboring countries for under $50. 

It’s hard to justify complaining when you’re abroad.
It’s an amazing opportunity. 

It’s incredible to get to casually eat dinner within sight of the Eiffel Tower twinkling at night, or to spend rainy days looking at priceless art in the Louvre, or to go country hopping on long weekends. It seems like you should have nothing to grumble about, and complaining just makes you look like a spoiled brat. At least, that’s how it can feel. 

No one really likes to talk about how isolating it can feel to be in such a different time zone compared to your friends and family. It’s something that didn’t seem like it would be a big deal to me, but I can’t tell you how many times it’s been 10 a.m. for me and I go to text someone and I realize that it’s 4 a.m. at home and it will be hours before I hear back from anyone. Once school picks up for people back at home, the time change can make things even harder. When I get up, everyone is asleep. When everyone gets up, I’m in class. When I’m out of class, everyone is in class. When everyone is getting out of class, I’m getting ready for bed. 

No one likes to talk about how people get busy, and after a while you start hearing a lot less from your friends, getting fewer and fewer “I miss you” texts. You know it’s not because they don’t miss you anymore, but it doesn’t stop you from thinking about how everyone’s life is moving right along despite the fact that you aren’t there.

No one likes to talk about how much the weather can affect you. I grew up in the south. It was 80 degrees on Christmas day at home. Here, I can probably count on two hands the number of times I’ve seen the sun in my two months here. 

No one likes to talk about how there are days when you just want to get on a plane and go home. Sometimes you hit a point where it feels like home is so far away, and I don’t mean in terms of distance. I mean that you look at a calendar and the three months you have left feel like they’ll take three years. 

Sometimes you get in a funk, and it’s hard to get out of. 

Obviously, I’m in a bit of one myself. Today I tried to go for a run and get some fresh air and exercise. I was thinking something along the lines of Elle Woods, “Exercise gives you endorphins, endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands.” Problem is about every other person you pass on the street is smoking, and constantly breathing in second hand smoke while running in the cold makes your lungs dry and burn like fire. I think I got more asthma than endorphins. 

To the friends and family of those studying abroad, I can’t ask you this enough. If your loved one abroad is having a hard time, don’t make them feel like they have no right to be sad because they’re in an incredible city. Homesickness is to be expected, but I can tell you that sometimes it’s not just a matter of missing home. 

Yes, life abroad is a bit of a fantasy world. But it would be  unfair to not warn future travelers about the low points of this wonderful world. Sometimes the fantasy wears thin.  I’m not saying you shouldn’t go abroad, because it really is incredible. I just think it’s only fair to warn you that while it can be one of the most rewarding things you will ever do, it can also be one of the hardest. 

I can’t say everyone will experience this; but, if you do, I can promise you aren’t alone. While right now I may not have the solution, maybe I’ll be able to give it to you soon.  

Au revior for now. 

-Kelsey

Cheers to You, London

Sorry for always taking so long to write these blogs. A lot of times I really have to just kind of wait it out so that I can look back on whatever it is I want to write about with fresh eyes.

As promised before, I'm giving London it's own blog.


First I'm going to give everyone some tips for visiting London:
Places to see:
-Westminster Abbey and Big Ben. Definitely worth the £18 (that's just to go inside, not to admire from the street).
-The London Eye. I still haven't had the chance to actually ride the London Eye yet, but it's on my bucket list. Even if you don't ride it, it still makes for a pretty picture.
-The British Museum. A museum with lots and lots, what primarily interests me are the Egyptian antiquities. I haven't been there in about five years, but it's definitely one that I want to go back to.
-Harrod's. Even if you don't buy anything, who wouldn't want to visit the world's most famous department store?
-The Covent Garden Market. It reminds me almost something of the Charleston market. There are table venders with art and jewelry, but there are also indoor cafes, designer boutiques, old school toy stores, and tea shops. Out front there's typically a magician or a man on a bike-on-stilts juggling swords, or break-dancers and really any kind of street entertainment.
-Picadilly Circus. Basically London's Time Square. Full of restaurants and things like M&M World, a Disney Store, designer boutiques, souvenir shops, and -my favorite- street musicians galore.
-Trafalgar Square. It's beautiful, and it's super relaxing to sit on the edge of the fountain and drink a coffee and spend a little time people-watching.
-Platform 9 3/4 at King's Cross Station.  Yes, it's a thing, and it's not just a thing at the Warner Brother's Studio Tour.

Things to Do:
-GO TO A SHOW AT ONE OF THE THEATERS. Seriously. You can get tickets for as low as £39. At the moment this converts to about $50, which for a show of the caliber you'll see in London is an incredible price. I've seen The Lion King and Wicked and have been blown away by both.
-Go into the bookstores. London is full of them, and they're all fantastic. As much as I love Books-a-Million(don't judge), these bookstores are better than any we have in the US.
-Eat fish and chips. So far my favorite that I've had were from Garfunkel's. It is a chain, but it's relatively in expensive compared to many of the other places. My fish and chips were I think £12.50, but a lot of places will run £16+. There's one right off of the plaza in Picadilly Circus, and I'm pretty sure there is also one really close to Trafalgar Square.
-WARNER BROS HARRY POTTER STUDIO TOUR. You HAVE to book tickets online in advance, they do not sell tickets at the studio. Also, to get there(if you're taking public transportation) is to take a train to Watford Junction, and then a charter bus will take you to the studio. The charter bus costs £2.50, so have some coins on you. And spend the £5 to get the audio guide, there is so much to see and the audio guide really helps you go in a logical order and helps you to not miss anything. Stop for a butterbeer!! Take your time, it took me from 9:30am until probably 1 in the afternoon to get through everything. Also spend sometime in the souvenir shop :) I plan on doing this again.



London is probably the happiest I've been since being in Europe. I think I have a little bit of a special bond with London. Going to London my junior year of high school was my first time to Europe. I loved everything about London from the second I landed. The people are extremely friendly, the accents are addicting - as are the fish and chips, and London is just beautiful. On my high school trip, we were going from London to Paris. The last day in London we went to Harrod's, and I was talking to one of the school admins. on the trip about how I absolutely did not want to leave. That's when she suggested something that at the time I didn't even know what an option - study abroad for a semester. I decided then and there that it was something I was going to do. London and Paris is also where I found a love for historic architecture, and what actually set me on my original college path of Historic Preservation and Community Planning at the College of Charleston.

No, I'm not at College of Charleston anymore; no, I'm not a HPCP major(I won't bore you with that story, but I didn't switch out of it for a lack of loving it); and, no, I'm not studying abroad in London. While part of me kept wishing I had picked London, part of me was very glad I didn't. The British pound to US dollar conversion rate absolutely sucks for anyone who's money is in dollars. While I was there, £1 converted to about $1.47. Meaning you had to add $0.47 to every pound you were spending to get that amount in dollars. Also, as it is, Paris is one of the most expensive cities in the world. London is even more expensive. Also, both times I've been to London I've gotten lucky with uncharacteristically good weather. The UK in general isn't exactly known for being the sunshine capital of the world.

My trip to London was actually really really great and something I desperately needed. It came at the end of the week and half break from classes where I got to go city hopping, and at the first of those cities I had an absolute meltdown from homesickness. While I was in London though, I was honestly so happy. It was one of those "happys" that is so hard to explain because it was one that came after a fairly long period of always being kind of down. It's almost like that feeling of when you can finally breathe through your nose after a while of being sick, and you didn't realize until that moment just how much you couldn't breathe just a day before. It was one of those moments where I felt like myself again - where I had fun exploring by myself and where I could just walk around or sit in a bookstore and be happy or where I was excited to figure out the metro system or where I could sit in a restaurant by myself and not feel awkward. It was one of those moments where I could be alone, and I wasn't lonely. To me, that's one of the most freeing feelings in the world –– to not have to depend on anyone else or anything else to make you happy, to be happy with simplicity and with quiet and with your own presence.

I've never spent more than five days in London, but somehow I always feel a little changed for the better when I leave. Each time I have found a new love –– first it was of old architecture, and this last time it was with the theater. I've been to quite a few places in Europe at this point; and while I have liked all of them, I don't necessarily have any plans to revisit some of them. London is not one of those. I already can't wait until the next time I can go to London. Part of me is a little scared to go back, because I know I've kind of idealized it in my head at this point. It's always scary when we do that, because eventually the real thing will stop living up to how we remember it to be.

Right now, I'm content to remember London the way I do.

Cheers to you, London. I hope to see you again soon.



-Kelsey

~Other London photos are in my "Ticket for One" entry~

 Lyceum Theatre

 Covent Garden Market

Trafalgar Sqaure